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NVIDIA Fermi - Defender of the Universe

It's time once again for the GPU (Graphics Processing Unit) makers of the world to pawn their latest chipsets, and it looks like Nvidia has come out swinging with Fermi!

512 Cores! That's 16 stream multiprocessors at 32 cores each, followed by a fatty GDDR5 memory architecture implemented inside of a six 64-bit channel bus wrapped in bacon and deep fried.

Oh...I'm I getting too geeky for you? Let me break this down in layman's terms.

OK, so you force your Xbox and PS3 to get married. After a long night of drinking and some sex, PS3 wakes up feeling a bit queazy. PS3 says "What happened last night?" Xbox is like "Honey, I pounded your Blu-ray like a two dollar hooker is what happened." PS3 laughs...and says "did you wear protection?" Xbox groans, "The Wii was in the other room, and you know how long it takes to slide into that thing." "It's fine, don't worry about it you're region protected anyway..."

Well, it turns out PS3s aren't region protected. Long story short, PS3 poops out a bouncing baby silicon wafer seven weeks later (average PS3 gestation period).

This baby, we'll call "Fermi" exhibits an exceptional range of abilities. By age three (femtoseconds), Fermi is as gifted in math and science as my Asian housekeeper. By age six (femtoseconds), Fermi graduates from Cal Tech, summa cum laude. By age nine (femtoseconds), Fermi forms the Legion of Super Units - Defenders of the Universe.

After saving a few babies from various alligator and crocodile attacks, Fermi is awarded the Nobel Peace Prize. Before the dust even settles, Nvidia is selling Fermi on a cloning deal that will net billions.

So far Nvidia is light on the details, however they did announce that the Fermi chip will ship along with an advanced cooling system...a back-up, advanced cooling system and a superhero cape.

Rest assured, will be chomping at the bit to get our hands on one of these sexy little bastards.

If you're as interested in Fermi's life as we are, be sure to sign up for the N-word in the top right corner!